“Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering.” ~ Matthew 5:23-24
Have you ever offended a brother or sister in Christ? Perhaps it was unintentional, but suddenly you have that sneaking suspicion that you’ve truly offended someone, and you can feel the sense of distance growing between you and that person. Maybe you notice the way they look at you. Or perhaps you find that the closeness of your relationship has dwindled, but you’re not sure why.
But what should we do about those moments? What do we do when we’re just not sure about our relationship with another brother or sister? The temptation can be to just ignore it, or try to ‘push past’ the situation. We might even find ourselves saying, “If they’re offended, it’s on them to tell me!” But the Bible tells us something very different.
Jesus knows that coldness between brothers and sisters will eventually rip the body apart. He knows that offenses, even unintentional ones, can lead to huge rifts in the church.
So He commands His followers to do something about it.
In Matthew 5:23-24, He offers specific instructions about how to respond to those moments when we worry we’ve offended someone.
He imagines a situation where a man has come to worship at the altar, and he realizes his brother is offended, and ‘has something against’ him. Notice—this isn’t because he has sinned against that brother. The case is very general. He simply realizes that there is something between them in their relationship.
Jesus tells him, “Leave your offering!” He essentially says, “Don’t bother worshipping until you’ve dealt with the rift that you feel is there.” Jesus commands us to be reconciled to our brothers and sisters (even from perceived offenses) before we come to worship.
So, is there a person who you think you may have offended? Is there a relationship that feels suddenly distant, and you’re not sure why? The responsibility to deal with that falls to you! It’s on you, friend!
So go to your brother or sister, and humbly ask them, “I don’t want to presume at all, but is there anything between us where I’ve offended you? If not, I’m sorry! It’s just a feeling I have.”
If there is something real, deal with it right then. If there isn’t, rejoice, and apologize for presuming on their motives. Either way, you’ve won your brother.
