I write this post with no little hesitation.
It’s like when I hear a sermon on money, evangelism, or prayer…my heart shrinks. I feel guilty for my failures in all three areas. And the desire not to feel this makes me want to avoid those topics. But that won’t do. God wants me to deal head-on with every one of His words.
So, what is the topic that makes me wince? It’s loving my wife from Eph 5:25. [Before you cast the first stone, stay with me.]
As we’re home more than ever, we’re interacting with our family more than ever. With more interaction comes more exposure of what we’re really like. And with more exposure comes more insight into our hearts: I’m so angry, full of grumbling, selfishness…
And as I read Eph 5:25, the bad news of my failure rings out in me. Not that I don’t love her at all, but the consistency and genuineness with which I ought to love her fluctuate more than I care to confess. I’m selfish; I love myself above all.
So, the Spirit brings the bad news of my heart to my attention through the Word. Then I consider how Eph 5 might apply to me. The Spirit also helps me do that. But then, the reality of this command and the gravity of Christ’s example sit there…How can I ever love my wife as Christ loved the church?
Then I realize that the command wasn’t written to condemn us. It was written to be kept…joyfully in fact. And I do love my wife. But I also fail to love her. So, what do I do?
I have to go back to the basics. Who am I? I am a new creature in Christ. I have His Spirit in me; Christ lives in me. I am dead to sin and alive to God (Rom 6:12). What has God done for me? God has forgiven me of all my sins, including the sin of not loving my wife (Eph 4:32). Jesus Christ loved me and gave Himself up for me, the perfect husband for the radically imperfect wife (Eph 5:2).
And because all this is true, I can imitate God and Christ (Eph 5:1). Yes, I will fail to love my wife. I will fail at all of God’s commands. But by His grace, I can repent of my sin, trust in His forgiveness, and rely on His power to do all that He’s called me to.
Praise God that He has blessed us with every resource in Christ to do just that!
